Posted in Lifestyle, Motivation, POV

SELF EVALUATION – The Proper Way to Do It.

Nobody’s perfect. Yup, you too sweetie. But, you can get better by evaluation. Find out what you’re doing right/wrong and what you’re not doing at all. You don’t always have to wait for people to tell you when you’re going wrong. Matter of fact, I grew up as a very self conscious person. Constantly analysing and over analysing myself; physically and psychologically. As a Personality Nine, that is, a Peace Maker, I’m always checking and rechecking myself to ensure I’m acting the way I need to act to avoid conflict. You might call me a bit of a people pleaser, but that’s really not my business.

In actuality, I hate sanctimony and it’s people. People who believe they can never do anything wrong and their actions are always justified. People who don’t believe there’s a different approach to different people. Rather, I like adaptable people. People who are a different person depending on who they’re with.

But isn’t that pretence and living fake?

No sweetie, it’s not. You know that guy who looks down on everyone for something, meanwhile, in actuality, he’s lacking in that area or just lucky to not be? That girl who criticises all the girls she sees with boys publicly but is capable of a gangbang with 4 boys in one night? Yeah! Those people. Those are the fakers. But the adaptable one is that one that knows people and how to approach them. With different people, he/she might seem different; one person might tell you they’re calm and never say anything while another will tell you they’re very vocal and expressive. In actuality, that person is smart and evaluative – of him/herself and – of the environment he/she is in.

Today, sweethearts, I’ll be telling you how you can be the person people love.

Even though that isn’t entirely possible.

You’re a bad guy to someone. That’s just life. But that will be talked about in the next blog post. This post is to tell you how to live an evaluative life.

Consider Every Form Of Criticism

Including the one from ‘haters‘.

There’s basically 3 reasons why people would criticise you.

  1. They really want to see the best version of you. This type of criticism tends to be in private -when there’s no one around. It also tends to come as a piece of advice. It comes when people see you tilting toward a negative side and they want to control that before you completely fall.
  2. They want to ruin everyone’s good thoughts about you. The people who do this are who we call the ’haters’. They’re usually jealous of your achievements – whatever they might be – and look for your weaknesses.
  3. You really did fuck up. Most times, these are public criticisms too. A person is disappointed and most likely even hurt by whatever you did.
  • We’ll only be looking at 1 and 2 though because obviously, the whole point of Self Evaluation and this blog post is so we can avoid number 3 hence, away we go.
  • When someone criticises you in private, good for you, it means very little people have noticed how much of an asshole you are or are becoming. People who give you private criticism are people who were quick to notice you derailing. You might think: ”Hey, I’m not doing anything wrong.” and you might be right and that person is just overreacting but as soon as 3, 4 and 5 people start to tell you that. Dude, it’s time for some serious self evaluation! Else, you’ll give your ’haters’ something to tell the ’non-hating’ world.
  • P.S: These private criticism would most likely come from people who are close to you. People who get to watch you frequently. I would go into it, but then, I wouldn’t have anything to post next week so…
  • chillllllll.
  • Now, when the criticism is from your haters, what do you do?
  • Should even be listening to what people who don’t like you have to say about you?
  • Well, typically, no. Definitely, their feelings are clouding their judgement. The reason it is helpful though is that they look for the microscopic flaws in you and try to magnify it. This means you can use them and their opinions as a microscope.
  • Turn the tables around.

    Don’t Always Wait for Criticism.

    If you’re a very impulsive person, like I am – that is, you make decisions and take actions as they come to you -, you might need to change.

    Just a tad bit. Nothing major.

    Second think certain things. I know its different from who you usually are but trust me, it’s better for you.

    Don’t Ask Your Friends or People That Like You.

    Ask people you barely ever talk to as well. Not your haters sha…because, well, they obviously hate you and so will say anything to bring you down and make you feel bad. Ask people you know you aren’t really close to enough for them to kiss your ass.

    In conclusion, carrying you carry out your ’research’, you realise that the person who brought up that bad thing about you or your character is outnumbered, you can write them off. If they aren’t outnumbered, sweetheart, I’m tryna say this in the most subtle way possible; YOU HAVE PROBLEMS AND NEED SOME SERIOUS CHANGING. I’m just kidding. You really do need to change though if people aren’t digging what you’re laying down.

    Engagements:

    • Have you ever been called out?
    • What did you do when you realised there was something you needed to change about yourself?
    • Any tips for resetting bad habits?

    #BeVocal 💜

    Author:

    Teen with the soul of a child and musings of an adult💖 http://www.mirakee.com/brownie_vocal

    8 thoughts on “SELF EVALUATION – The Proper Way to Do It.

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