Day 8 of the 15-day lockdown writing challenge.
I can’t believe you’re gone. Google Photos pops up a few pictures of you and those pictures remind me of the things that crossed your mind back then. I wonder why you ever thought those things.
I remember you wouldn’t live, so you had to die. I remember you hated how you looked. You weren’t enough, so you had to go. I remember you only saw the ephemeral side of love and that’s not enough to keep someone fighting. I remember you cried till your sobs choked you because you were trying to be quiet.
Honestly, I don’t have much to say except that I accept you. And no, I don’t think it’s too late for that. You were a mess and you were wrong about so many things, but I can’t deny the fact that when I was your age, I was you. I did all those things. I thought all those thoughts. Some of those things were absolutely terrible but you’re different now. You learnt. You died.
You had to go if I was to grow. You had to leave if I was to live. When I was your age, I was you but I’m not you. So right now, rest in peace.